Fashion, Lifestyle & Parenting Blog

Recognizing I Needed Help

My husband always listened to the rundowns of my daily battles. I could tell it was dragging him down as well. It wasn’t fair to have everyone in the house emotionally sink with me.

I needed to find an outlet, I needed to know what I wasn’t realizing I was doing to create these behaviours and patterns. Not just for my family, but for me too.

Calling all McDreamy’s?

After getting everyone to bed one evening I put my nagging feelings to work. I searched online for answers to my negative reactions and outbursts. Let me tell you, the list of disorders I might have been alarming… Right down to a brain tumour.

I cannot begin to believe all these top search engine results. I don’t feel like I’m sick, and no one has ever hinted to me that I seem like it. I moved on to the next avenue of results. Therapy.

To see a therapist, I had to get a referral from my general practitioner. So, I made an appointment to plea my case as to why I am losing my mind and seeking help.

At the appointment my Dr. seemed to ask me a lot of questions about my home life and work life, which just made me anxious. I knew what this was leading to. My worst fear, medication.

I’ve had many appointments with my Dr. about certain instances in my life where I felt less than great about my mental health. Every time I went, I was just brushed off with the option of an SSRI to manage and a suggestion to go out and have a wine night with my friends.

I requested to have a referral to a therapist from my Dr. And as I predicted “let’s try this first” an SSRI prescription. I tried them once and they just had me zombified and miserable. They were not the answer to my problems. So, I left with a prescription I’d never fill, again.

Finding A Women’s Life Coach

The Dreaded Mirror

Knowing now that a referral for therapy wasn’t in my future for an unforeseeable time, I looked at other avenues. I stumbled across a women’s life coach. I had never heard of a life coach before, let alone a women’s life coach. Reading about some of what this life coach offers –

  • Gain Emotional Control
  • Be Pro-Active Instead of Re-Active
  • Implementing Boundaries
  • Move Past Current Situations
  • Listening To What I Wasn’t Saying
  • Develop Strategies
  • Self-Sabotage
  • Partner Miscommunications

I was thrilled with how my needs would be met. It wasn’t going to be a daunting dive into my past and unleashing all my childhood boohoos. This was going to be about where I wanted to go in life and working through my now. Exactly what I needed.

Booking My Life Coach Consultation

I immediately booked a consultation to see how I would vibe with a local life coach. At first I was nervous about living in a small town, Norfolk, Ontario that I may know this person somehow. (I said I didn’t like anxiety meds… not that I didn’t have anxiety LOL)

Before I went for my consultation with the life coach, I went to my bedroom mirror to try to tell myself this was what I needed. I’m famous for putting myself on the back burner.

I always have a hard time looking at myself in the mirror, I never have positive reflections. I’m sure this will be one of the many hurdles I will be faced with when working with my life coach. Gulp.

Life Coach on Point

Deep Dishing Deets

After my consultation I felt so relieved! I was going through every possible way my appointment could go wrong leading up to it. I was heard, validated, and given strategies to push through the first few obstacles I was wanting to face. Yes, what I wanted to work through… Amazing.

We talked about how I felt like I was failing as a mom and wife. I was overreacting to situations that weren’t the end of the world and leaving us all feeling emotionally scarred. Those moments in the day really are what I am up all night stirring about.

The life coach had me tell her what a day was like for me. She immediately had a few questions about myself when I finished.

  • When do you have “you” time?
  • Where are the positive moments in your day?
  • How do I wish my day would be?

I was thrown back by all 3. Had I been so negative in my retell of a day? Have I stopped seeing the positive in everything?

Positive Homework

Shit Happens

I started my journey to feel like my best self. With the life coach by my side and guiding me to be looking at the positives, I was already feeling a change in our home.

It was so odd to me that something so simple as seeing the positive, and accepting shit happens for a reason was working.

Spilled cereal… Fighting for the sink… Being a couple minutes late… all those things used to be followed with a ferocious mom threatening to end lives. My life coach had me look at those things like they are all minor blips and opportunities for us all to grow.

Spilled cereal… A lesson of how to clean up and be more independent. Fighting for the sink… A bonus time to get something else done while waiting. Being slightly late… didn’t end the world. And we all had a good laugh about how we were going to see who more organized tomorrow could be.

I am so grateful to have found a life coach, for me and my family. This is only the first step we have started, and I am already seeing the ripple effect in us all.